When you look at the minefield of life and the countless number of challenges we go through it is a wonder anyone can sustain a long term relationship. Understanding this is one of the first steps you need to take when learning how to prevent a divorce.
Changes in circumstances, differences of opinion and simple misunderstandings can cause serious relationship strains which unaddressed, can lead to a falling apart of the marriage. When love seems elusive for both partners, many assume that how to prevent a divorce is impossible and that it’s time to call it quits. But you can save your marriage if you have the right system to use. This save the marriage review might help you get a clearer picture of your marriage and what problems you have to tackle in the first place. And no this is not another guide about “improving your communication” because that can actually be a really bad thing to do.
A divorce can be both emotionally draining and mentally challenging.
It can affect your family life, work performance, and even relationships with others. Although a divorce may seem appealing, it may not be the best solution especially if children are involved. However strained your relationship may be with your spouse, there are always effective approaches on how to prevent a divorce, as long as both of you are willing to make it happen.
How to Prevent a Divorce: Sensible Tips to Save Your Marriage
- Stop Fighting – Heated arguments can cause small problems to escalate. Instead of getting into another verbal battle with your spouse, control the urge to lash out and use the time to listen to what your partner has to say. Once you begin listening, try to find the truth in his or her words and let your spouse know that you agree with his or her opinion.
For example, if your spouse accuses you of being a constant nagger, take a moment to reflect on the statement. Instead of giving a flared up reaction, you can say: “Yes, you’re right. I admit that I can be a nagger at times. It’s just that I tend to do that when I feel like you’re not listening to me or valuing my opinion. I’ll try not to do it again.”
It is generally difficult to argue with someone who agrees with your point. Also, by agreeing and admitting your own faults, you are taking responsibility while opening up a positive means of communication which is a very effective strategy on how to prevent a divorce.
- Lighten Up – When a couple is nearing a divorce, even the smallest bit of contact or communication can be heavy and strained. This can lead to couples withdrawing from each other, just to avoid another heated argument. If this continues, partners will feel even more alienated from each other. To prevent this, make the effort to lighten up your mood. This will help ease the tension, and reduce pressure on the relationship.
- Reflect On Your Own Actions – Another big step you can take when looking at how to prevent a divorce is by reflecting on your own actions. The tendency is that partners can blame each other for a failed relationship. But remember, it always takes two to tango, and that saying definitely applies to a marriage. Take some time to review what your partner is always complaining about and be proactive in finding ways to improve yourself on that particular aspect.
Show your spouse the positive changes that he or she wants to see and be sincere about the change. Once your partner sees the effort that you’re making, he or she is most likely to follow your example.
- Re-establish Intimacy – Many couples undergo divorce because the have drifted apart and feel like there is nothing between the two of them anymore. Start with baby steps such as asking your partner how his or her day went. Give your spouse a hug upon waking up, and kiss your partner before they leave for work. These small gestures may seem difficult to do at first, especially when couples have lost affection for each other. However, when these small gestures are done everyday, it gets easier through time, and it also makes a big impact in reestablishing intimacy.
These are just some of the steps you can take when learning how to prevent a divorce.
Turning a marriage around doesn’t happen overnight but perseverance and continued effort by both of you can save your marriage. Soon enough your partner will begin to see the changes in you, and he or she will see you in a more positive light.
Don’t wait for your partner to start the change, be the first to make a move.